Friday, January 18, 2008

Signs Of Peterborough Volume III


Well I wouldn't have thought it freakin' possible if I hadn't seen it with my own two eyes. The Colonel is trying to pull another serious rip job on the people of Peterborough. Jolene and I were cruising by the combo KFC and Taco Bell the other night when we were visually assaulted by this unbelievable price gauge by that uppity, gabardine wearing, soul patch sportin' chicken hawkin' bastard! Yeah you heard me! That crazy white haired goon is trying to charge the masses $125 for an extra piece of his greasy, 11 spiced chicken to wash down their gullets! The proof is in the signage amigos! The sign mavens at "Kentucky Fried Tacos" didn't even have a 5 to throw up on the board so they tossed an upside down deuce up for public viewing, makes me wonder, are they using the same guy who does the signs at the Trentwinds? What the deuce?
Speaking of the Trentwinds it seems to be all about sign placement. It's hard to see but in the background that's the half-lit sign for Thursdays (the peeler palace). What exactly are these wamblers advertising?
To the untrained eye it looks like a sign enticing you in to slurp back some hot soup on a cold winters day. What they're really advertising is a steaming cauldron of sin. It says "Come on in and dip your bones (if they could get away wit it they would have written boners) in the scorching loins of debauchery boys." Yeah, we know where that arrow is pointing - straight to the lust pot at the rear. Beware of "oral germ whores." When you're done getting infected sinners you can just take a quick jaunt down the street to get a hot cup 'o joe at the new and improved Tim Hor...where the term "donut hole" takes on a whole new meaning. Fritters and fluffers 24/7. So put that in your fudgepack!
B-spot on the crueller side of life!
WHUH!

4 comments:

Christine Ott said...

Maybe the Colonel is charging $125 for a "piece," you know, "of ass." Still, pretty expensive, at least by Trenton, NJ standards, but maybe the Colonel and his crew are "really, really worth it."

Brendage said...

Yeah Brah! I'm beginning to think this operation is just a front for some unsavoury bidness goin' down in the hood. I'll have to investigate further!

Brendage said...

Mr. Clean Said...
First... Eew?

Second. I'm certain that the KFC/TB sign is offering sexual favors, and not an extra piece of poulet, for $125.

Nothing like a nice piece of ass to put the capstone on a KFC dining experience, right?

On second thought, I've been inside several KFCs in my time, and... no, thanks.

Brendage said...

Judging from the selection $125 is alot to pay for an extra piece!
WHUH!